So 2005, what can I say… it sort of sucked and sort of rocked all for different things.
Worked a lot this year on drawing, inking, and coloring and actually got paid for them. Most of which you guy’s won’t see as the projects got canceled or the work is under a different name. Started back to work seriously on my own comics and I’m not sure how that’s going… it’s better then last year but I still need to find that balance I’ve lost. That’s what I’m planning to spend this year doing.
I finished 2 really old commissions but I still have 5 more outstanding all several years old at this point… I will finish them as soon as possible so that I only hate myself a little instead of a lot. I’m very very sorry about the wait.
This year I realized that I needed to value myself and my art more if I wanted to enjoy drawing comics again. It took me 2 years to figure out that I didn’t like the way my comic career was going. I wish my brain was more helpful sometimes. I was letting myself make choices because they were safe and easy but they made me unhappy so I changed the way I treated myself and my art. Mostly stopped giving my art and comics away for nothing. Now I either want to be paid something real… can’t stop laughing, or I want it to be all my own risk and all my gain. What’s the point of a middle man when there’s no money? I had already been so blocked that I hadn’t drawn a comic for a long time so this wasn’t a hardship, however…
In the process of realizing this I lost a long time close friend. I’d describe the fight we had as wacky, frustrating, and maddening in hindsight but at the time everything about it was like a blunt spoon dipped in acid being wedged slowly, with a fancy twisting motion, through the eyeball while being set on fire by clown-mimes as they insist that ‘you made them do it’ with interpretive dance and garbled text messages littered with sarcastic emoticons that read like someone is playing the game ‘Telephone’ all on top of a volcano that’s exploding… Dramatic readings of the resulting AIM conversations/fights cause much head scratching, laughing, crying, and ranting. My friends hugged me, dried my tears, and told me never to talk about it again. Still, I miss you and your paranoid one sided view of the world in which everyone is crazy and you are always the victim in any situation. I wish we’d never fought. =(
I updated my website to a blog and started using PHP instead of hand coding everything… it’s made me so much happier. Also now I can receive comments and that’s been awesome as the Harry Potter fans send me the funniest comments ever. Really, even death threats from the HP people have me rolling on the floor because nothing is funnier then some one telling you their fictional boyfriend Harry Potter would never be gay and that I should die in l33t speak.
Got hooked on Dance Dance Revolution Extreme 2… so far after only playing the game for 2 months I can now beat light level songs… still have quite a ways to go though. I bought a medium Red Octane pad and plan to mod it by taking the foam out and putting in a piece of wood instead. Mike is way ahead of me on DDR so I will suck compared to him when I head to his place for Further Confusion later this week. I’m heading out early this year and I’m almost all ready for the con this time. No more last minute con rush.
Bought a Webcomicnation account. So far things have gone well with that although I’m not making money with it. But I do know that it has helped to sell copies of the Saiko and Lavender Graphic at Yaoi con of all places. Thanks guys! At least now people don’t need a comic shop near them to read my comics.
Lurked all over LJ and the web this year and sometimes I commented on stuff.
I stopped going to websites that made me upset. This is new since I love to poke my head into things that make me unhappy. But I just sort of got to the point where no amount of information was worth the aggravation. Yay. Now if only I could cut down the time I spend
reading LJ.
Started to draw more things for myself and tried to sell those pictures. That’s going pretty well all and all. There’s always more work to do on that. I haven’t quite figured out what I’d like to concentrate on as “Everything” seems a bit broad to create any kind of fan base. I expect that at this point I’ll be unknown forever and I’ve got no problem with that… except on bad head days when I really do think no one likes me. Thankfully that passes. Although health care would be lovely.
Touch typing, I will defeat you. Now that I have an ergonomic keyboard I will force myself to not look at the keys and I will prevail.
I’m trying to learn not to over think things. It helps so much with the art. If I think I should do something, I’m working to get to the point where I’ll just go do it. No more doing other shit instead.
And that’s most of 2005. I started with me feeling like crap and has slowly been getting better. Now I hope I can start 2006 on a better foot.
Some day I’ll get enough XP to level up to the point where I don’t suck at life. Then who knows maybe I’ll go kill more treadmill bunnies and collect enough gold to buy a clue.
Tags: News, Rambling by Diana Sprinkle
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